Hausmann's Top Ten Things to Do & Not to Do With KIds in Paris

Pulitzer winning journalist Jonathan Freedman has generously contributed another article to Eye Prefer Paris.Hausmann's Ten Top Things to Do & Not to Do With Kids in Paris is a condensed version of a series of practical posts Jonathan wrote for his charming blog The Confessions of a Hausmann.

Hausmann's Ten Top Things To Do With Kids in Paris

1. Enjoy petit dejeuner, breakfast, at any old Parisian café.  Order the antique hot chocolate. Pour the molten cocoa into the steaming milk, and taste the soft warm buttery croissants.

2. Visit my relatives – the apes and hominids – in a glass case at the Museum of Natural History.  Marvel at the skeletons of creatures under one roof.  Imagine them coming alive on Hausmann’s Ark.You might discover that my relatives are your relatives too.

3. Sip sweet minty Moroccan tea at the Café de la Mosquee,feed the sparrows out of your hands,and stroll down the Jardin des Plants,holding hands beneath the spreading boughs.

4. Spend a day at the Cite de la Villette, the Science and Technology museum, and play on the amazing interactive displays.Don’t miss the 3-D movies: the monsters of the deep jump out at you.

5. Buy cheap trinkets for kids and friends back home.My favorites are the light up Eiffel towers,and of course,the miniature twirling Eiffel key chains.

6. Descend ancient stone stairs to the footpath alongside the River Seine, and watch the barges and boats pass by.We enjoyed the boat bus that you can board and get off, but walking is for free.

7. Jump on the trampolines and whirl on the merry go round in the Tuileries. Then treat yourself to tarte d’ pomme, apple tart.

8. When it starts to pour, run outside the nearest church and watch the gargoyles spitting out rainwater.The word ‘gargoyle’ has the same root as gargle.

9. Buy a multiple-day pass to the Metro, and get a free Metro map.Paris lies before you, and you can get anywhere, if you’re willing to stand up in the crowded cars.

10. Stand atop the Eiffel Tower and gaze out at Paris.Tip your hat to Baron Haussmann for laying out the city.

Petit dejeuner

  Hausmann’s Top Ten Things Not to Do In Paris

 Thou Shalt Not:
 
1. Drag heavy suitcases or strollers through the Metro subway system. You will be hoisting them up and down innumerable flights of stairs, and navigating through a maze of tunnels.It may be worth paying a taxi to take you from the train depot to your hotel.We actually found it was cheaper,too!
 
2. Don’t forget to pull your Metro ticket out of the slot as you push through the gate.If you leave the ticket, you can’t get back in.And you’ll have to buy a new one. 
 
3. Do not take young children on an extensive tour of Western Art through the Ages in the Louvre.More fun is the Musee d’ Orsay,housed in a gorgeous train station.You can climb to the top story,stand behind the face of the enormous clock, watch the minute hand move, and sip hot chocolate at a café. On the way out, you might say hi to Van Gogh, and admire the delicate bronze ballerina by Degas.Outside the museum, a small plaque commemorates a little known historical fact: The Nazis and their collaborators deported French Jews from the Gare d’Orsay to the extermination camps.You may want to pause and reflect.
 
4. Don’t stroll off deep in conversation, and leave your poor kid alone in a strange city.In retrospect, Lincoln wasn’t the only one who deserved a spank on the butt.We parents deserved a paddling for leaving him behind.The ‘Missing Linc’ incident scared some sense into us.We enforced a rule: Kids, never cross a street without holding a grownup’s hand -- and look eight ways.Those crazy Parisian chauffeurs  may be deadly dangerous.Remember what happened to Princess Di.
 
5. Don’t pretend you’re a Parisian intellectual by wearing a cheap crimson beret to a café. As you muse existentially about the meaninglessness of it all, you’ll stick out like a red toadstool.
 
6. Don’t turn your nose up at the Latin Quarter because it’s touristy.You’re a tourist, okay!The joints are kid friendly and fun.You can sample cuisines from many regions and nationalities, and travel around France and the globe.The wine is cheap, the food not that great, but they don’t give a damn if kids are noisy.However, you may want to avoid the cheapest fixed Menu.You get what you pay for.Don’t order American coffee. Don’t ask for Freedom Fries,it’s an insult to France’s independence of spirit and support for liberty, beginning with the American Revolution.
 
7. Don’t book a hotel, sight unseen, based on its name.On the web, I discovered the Gran Hotel de France.It sounded grand, but when we got there it was a seedy hole in the wall, with creaky stairs, dilapidated carpets, and leaky bathroom fixtures.The room was barely big enough to fit four cots, and the tiny black and white TV was mounted on the ceiling and inaudible.Silver lining: The kids didn’t watch TV all week, and we all snuggled together in the beds.It was cozy and comfortable.Don’t expect a grand room for a budget price.Parisians live in cramped quarters; the City of Light is their living room.
 
8. Don’t out without an umbrella or raincoat.For blue skies may turn dark and bring downpours.The Paris weather is as mercurial as, well, the Parisians personality.I believe that the philosopher, Montaigne, elucidated the connection between climate and culture a few centuries ago.One of the few things I remember from my freshman Humanities course.Thank you, ‘Core Curriculum’!
 
9. Don’t try to buy a bottle of wine after hours. There’s a law against selling bottled spirits after 9 p.m.Puritanism?  Hardly.It’s to keep the bars and cafes open late and filled with customers, and to keep winos off the streets.But the latter is a miserable failure.Paris has many homeless people and panhandlers, but they’re not as aggressive as those begging in the shadows of America’s glass skyscrapers.
 
10. Don’t trust the TGV.It may be the smoothest, fastest, most pleasant journey – or a nightmare.This raises the question: Would we do it again?Yes, as soon as we can afford tickets, we’ll be back to Paris.

 Read the full series and the audio version at http://confessionsofahausmann.tumblr.com/post/222707061/hausmanns-top-10-list-of-things-to-do-and-not

Jonathan Freedman, a Pulitzer prize-winning journalist and author, recently visited Paris with his family.  He currently lives in Switzerland and is writing a blog,  “Confessions of a Hausmann,” about his misadventures as a “marvelous” husband raising two “model” children and keeping an “immaculate” house in a “charming” central European country – not!  Find the blog at:
 http://confessionsofahausmann.tumblr.com 

The book "The Man Who'd Bounce the World" on the web:  http://bouncetheworld.tumblr.com

Email Jonathan jonathanfreedman755@me.com 

Funny makeovers

Jonathan at the tower

Coming soon: Eye Prefer New York Tours

New! Eye Prefer Paris Cooking Classes
I am happy to announce the launch of Eye Prefer Paris Cooking Classes. Come take an ethnic culinary journey with me and chef and caterer Charlotte Puckette, co-author of the bestseller The Ethnic Paris Cookbook (with Olivia Kiang-Snaije). First we will shop at a Paris green-market for the freshest ingredients and then return to Charlotte’s professional kitchen near the Eiffel Tower to cook a three-course lunch. After, we will indulge in the delicious feast we prepared along with hand-selected wines.

Cost: 185 euros per person (about $240)
Time: 9:30AM- 2PM (approximately 4 1/2 hours)
Location: We will meet by a metro station close to the market
Class days: Tuesday,Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday
Minimum of 3 students, maximum 6 students.

Click here to sign up for the next class or for more info.

Comments

[A]

funny-----and true - all around.

[Molly]

I was there last summer with my 2 & 5 year old, sans husband, to visit my dad. We had a lovely time & saw every park and playground in Paris. In addition to some of the things mentioned above, we loved the Jardin d'acclimatation, we went to the Children's Museum part of the Science Museum twice, we picnicked and caught tadpoles in the streams of the Parc des Buttes Chaumont, and we loved checking out all the playgrounds, pony rides and puppet shows at the Jardin Ranelagh. I used Fodor's guide Around Paris with kids and the Paris City Walks with Kids extensively.

[Diogenes]

Perfect..I'm forwarding this to my sister in Victoria, BC, who plans to visit Paris soon with a 9 year old and a 7 year old. Better her than me!

[Online Doctor Consultation]

Paris is on the top of my dream destination. Who wouldn't feel the life if you're on the most romantic place in the world? This blog is simply amazing because all are about Paris. I'm gonna keep this for future reference.

[Barb Reininger]

To the person that wrote that Paris is on the top of their dream destinations?.....You MUST go one one of Richard's walking tours and I suggest you do so the first or second day -- it will make your entire trip so much more enjoyable and make you more aware to look for all the details and incredible beauty all around you that is Paris. Yes, it is incredibly romatic, with our without a romatic prospect!
barb in texas

[Barb Reininger]

Hey, Richard!
LOVED the series on musee Orsay -- we visited Orsay on our second day in Paris, and it was AFTER that that I learned I needed to look UP and DOWN and all around to take in all the beauty there is to see. Having you highlight the details was terrific, because I must say, I think I missed it! I was too intent on the paintings and sculptures and missed the amazing architecture and didn't really notice the sculptures outside! That and I am photographically-challenged and had a new digital camera that I was still trying to figure out.

You have a fabulous 'eye' for detail and beauty and thank you for sharing your always unique and special point of view.

LHK & P! (love hugs kisses & PARIS)
my very best to you,
barb in texas

[Puma Complete]

The best part is the description! You have to love that.My kid has always been fascinated with astrology. He's too young to understand things about NASA but I'm glad to find this so I could somehow explain to him a bit even though I do not completely understand it all.